A Kiss

Red Rose by Chandrika221

On dreams more pleasant than reality. Dublin, 2013.


I've thought of kissing you, many times in many places
Your face held between my hands as our
Lips meet and meet again

We've stood on moonlit bridges as the midnight tide
Beneath us swells and rises,
Pressed against the kitchen counter
Whilst all around cutlery
Crashes to the ground

I've thought of you at sunset
Drenched in gold and red
I've dreamt of you at dawn
Silver, blue
Between my sleepy eyes and yawns
My forming thoughts and muddy head

Sometimes you look surprised, as though you didn't know
I act the shy, I look away, I wait to kiss another day
Other times we're hot as flame, lust's the word and sin's the game
Flesh press, teeth clash, we kiss and kiss and kiss again

I want the second, I feel the first

When the scene starts with a laugh
We're like a pair of kids, we tease it out
We play about the things we haven't said
Running in and out of possibilities until,
With a tickle or a splash, we arrive at that
Rash moment of plunging in and drowning

When the scene starts solemnly
As apt it is to do upon the bridge
And I am within the full attention of your stare
That is when I tend to lose the dare
My words get caught behind my teeth
My cheeks flush and my throat runs dry

I welcome the first, I fear the second

We meet in your house, in my house, in cafes
We've said hello at airports and goodbye on trains
We've laughed over meals, cried over drinks
We walk arm in arm through woods beside seas

A hundred thousand ways in which we meet
In which we kiss

Can a hundred thousand maybes
Make up for one true really?

I've learned not to ask for the things that I want
If it's a no, I'd rather not know

In one no, all maybes die

And if a yes, one really yes
My soul is sold

All things you want can be taken away
Nothing you love can be owned
To lay yourself weak, to open your heart
Exposed to the rain and the frost and the stars

I haven't the courage

And neither should you

I fear the second: that I have nothing to say
That you'll think me a fool, that you'll walk away
That you'll laugh and look down, that you'll
Chuckle and frown, tut your tongue and look to the sky
Wonder why I hadn't noticed that you preferred another

Yet the first is worse.

The passion, the flame, the spark, the fire
The lava, the flow, smoke rising higher
Your scent, my sweat, the salt
The grit, the grail.

Treasure is claimed,
It isn't cherished.

Rivers of ice and molten rock

Denied or won
One kiss can kill a thousand maybes

Let me dream a little longer.